Everyone is looking to meet new and exciting people through dating and fun activities. Online dating has provided a gateway for people to meet others with similar interests. While most sites focus on matchmaking and profiles, HowAboutADate.com works to empower the singles community and encourages singles to post a fun activity opposed to filling out a long questionnaire. So what do you wear? What do you say? I've provided some tips that will help you show up prepared and improve your dating experience!Body language: When you’re confident and comfortable you’ll become more animated, smile more, lean in, and use more eye contact. Most people are attracted to a confident person and body language is the first way to show confidence. It’s important to avoid slouching, looking down, and keeping your arms crossed.
First impressions are unavoidable: Whether we like it or not, we all judge people based off the first few seconds that we see them. It’s very important that you present yourself as a confident individual and I'd recommend wearing comfortable and respectable attire. If you look unprofessional, people treat you unprofessional.
Pick a unique date: While dinner and a happy hour isn't always a bad thing, most successful dates involve a little creativity. It’s important to pick a date that you’re comfortable doing and will provide mutual enjoyment. People love to share their stories and it’s much more exciting to share a story about hiking to the top of Mount Tamalpais than having a casual dinner at a local restaurant. Accomplishing goals with someone is always a quick way to build a bond or friendship.
Be yourself, be comfortable: Lies never last longer than a date or two. It’s much more effective to just be yourself opposed to pretending to be someone you’re not. It’s important to pick an activity that you’re passionate about as that’ll allow you to be comfortable and less nervous. Make sure you leave having had a good time and if you're date wasn't 'into' the activity, it may be time to move onto another person.
Don’t shy away from compliments: Everyone gets an occasional compliment, but to many people deflect the compliment by bringing up flaws or problems about it. Instead of coming up with a reason that their compliment is invalid, try thanking them and smiling, it’ll feel more rewarding to them and help boost your confidence as well.
Conversations are two sided: Conversations are crucial if you want a second date. While many people don’t have a problem talking about themselves, it’s important to remember that there is someone else in the conversation. Most people ask questions that they want to be asked, this means a safe counter question is usually something similar to what you were asked. It’s also good to inquire about certain topics, if your date is a doctor you can ask what field they work in, or where they studied. People like to know you’re listening and interested. Everyone loves a comedian but there is a line that can easily be crossed. It’s alright to be funny and drop some occasional jokes, but every sentence doesn't have to have a punch line. Keep on topics that are mutual, don't force your opinion or choose to talk about something that aggravates you. Bringing up politics on the first date is a big turnoff.
Now that you have the basics you’re ready to get out there and practice!
Arthur G. Bahr
Social Instigator for...